enlightenment
when i see anywhere i see me.
when i see me i see everything.
the lines between me and whats around me begin to blur. cant differentiate myself with the rest. whose hands are typing this out. where is my mind. whats generating these thoughts in a coherent order. where am I. Am i within this room ? why do I smell the samosas on the stall? they arent here. they are a memory. memory. the only proof i have that i am alive.
when i see the world. the electric impulses take some time to reach my brain. then what i m seeing is how the world was a fraction of a second before. not how it is now. there is no simultaneous experience of the world. its all in a memory. the present is in the shortest of memories. the past is in the longterm memories. the future … where is it ? is that too in my memory ? does that explain what premonition is?
do i already know everything but have forgotten it all ? am i just reliving things i already have lived?
knowing how i am gonna live this life..and actually living it once already. is there a difference in that ?
why do i feel sublimated when i look at the most simplest of things.
the few molecues of smoke coming out of the exhaust of some local transport BUS service. they tingle my nose. i can feel the presence of that bus coz of those few molecules. interdependance ? the bus needed the smoke to tell me it was there.
can i directly sense the bus without any interference ?
is the bus real ?
or is it just that the probabillity of the manifestations around the bus leading me to believe the bus is there?
i already know evrything. i am trying to remember. i do remember. its pretty vague. i need to be vaguer. vagueness will make me real.
